This HR dept doesn’t negotiate with Terrorists.
“We dressed up as the book Madeline, with six people dressed up as her and me as Ms. Clavel, their teacher. One of the Madelines, however, was the truly special one…the one with the beard, that is. Our experience was hysterical—I’d walk all the girls (and one guy) down the street in two straight lines. Guys would be walking the other way, whistling or hollering at all the pretty ladies. Then, as they got to the back of the line, they’d see my friend Brennan, then they’d see me, and I could tell that they were suddenly wondering if ALL the Madelines were men.”
the last sentence
There will never be a time when I don’t reblog this because it is my fave.
the signs as criminals
taurus: money laundering
gemini: con artist
leo: violent protest leader
scorpio: cult leader
sagittarius: pick pocket
pisces: drug dealer
Cards Against Humanity.
I’m a big fan. Well, I bought this.
It’s great. It hold all of my shit. But it holds something else too.
If you have it, open your box.
You see how I started to tear away at the top of the box there?
Do it carefully.
There’s something in there. What could that be?
There’s a card.
There is a card literally hidden in the top of the box.
But what card?
I fucking love these people.
One time in like 5th grade I had this teacher and she gave us all bottles of shit like this and told us to squeeze it all out and of course we were like fuck yeah and did it and then she said, “Now, try and shove it all back in the container.” Of course we all tried, and then stared at her confused as shit. When we all obviously gave up, she said, “In the moment, you were so consumed with what you were doing that you didn’t realize the mess you were making. Then, after it was so quickly and easily poured out, you realize it is impossible to put it all back in. Remember this for the rest of your lives when it comes to the words that come out of your mouth” and we were like 10 so we were like yeah ok whatever lady, but somehow to this day I think of it constantly.